| Location | Hemel Hempstead |
| Age | 29 years |
| Cause of Death | Overdose |
| Date of Birth | 30/03/1976 |
| Date of Death | 22/03/2006 |
| Visitors | 2,872 since 20/03/2009 |
| Creator |
Oh Paul... If only I had of known that when you phoned me.... If only had known it was going to be the last time I would ever have a real conversation with you...
If only I had known, I would have kept you on the phone talking all day...!
Instead I was busy, I cut the call short... ( I'm so, so sorry)
The very last thing you said to me was "give my love to the girls" - my two daughters.
A few hours later you died...
I was driving home from work when i got the call, my mobile rang it was Mum, but before i could answer she rang off... a few moments later it rang again this time it was John "our older brother"... I knew something was wrong i had that terrible sick feeling...
When i answered all i could hear was Mum screaming...
I spent hours holding your hand in the funeral home, talking to you saying all the things I wish I had said when you was alive... ( you looked just like you was sleeping, i would to look at you and and think any second now his going to say Boo!.. you looked SO peaceful....
You started taking drugs in your teen's and then, by the time you were in you twenties you was hooked on heroin...
Dispite this you did try and lead a 'normal' life, and you was so proud when you became a daddy to Bethany in 2001...
Oh Paul i would give anything to take you out one more time for your favorite treat, a chinese.... I know you would order your favourite 'spare ribs'. I would order you a lager and buy you a pack of cigarettes...
But I know that this can never ever happen... "But if only i could turn back the hands of time!..."
At your funeral the church was packed, we played this song (you always said it reminded you of us)...
I helped to carry you in and out of the church, I spoke about you, I told everybody that you was my rough cut diamond... ( some people said that maybe i should'nt do this, maybe it would be too much for me...)
But..
It was the last thing I could do for you... and i was going to do it....
And i did, i never ever thought i could feel the way i do to-day,
Oh Paul I miss you so, so very much... (it hurts my body...)
Almost a year to the day that you died ( just one day! 21.03.07) I gave birth to my own son...
His middle name is Paul... ( He looks just like you)
PAUL
I wish you never died,
I think of you every single day,
God Bless, and may you
rest in peace...
Your Sis
Jane
xXx
Brother Paul
Hi little Bro, can not believe it's been five year's today, i miss you so much. There are such treasured memories of growing up with you, and it's still hard to accept that you're no longer here, my self, Hannah, Sam, Mum & Dad are calling up at 4pm today to say hello, but i guess you know this, love your Big Bro John xx
Paul I was a school friend of Jane's and a neighbour while you lived in Woodhall Farm
You were always such a cheeky chap, happy, jolly and full of life. I remember you riding your bike up and down Cleves Road as fast as anything!
Where did things go so wrong?!
Such a shame that you are no longer here giving your family joy, happiness and love.
Hope you are looking down on them now watching over them.
I hope you have found the peace in heaven that you were searching for on Earth.
Sleep well
Tracy xxx
hello paul
Hi paul never really got the chance to get to know you but heard a lot about you. sounds to me you got mixed up in the wrong crowd and that happens to people. jane misses you and visits your site a lot .she gave me the computer tonight and she was still logged into your site.I love your sister very much but i have brought a lot of bad luck to the table but hopefully that has passed now and we are fairly positive about the future. look after your sister mum dad bro and all the kids hope you happy goodnight mark.
on your 34th bithday
before you were conceived i wanted you .before you were born i loved you . before you were here an hour i would die for you . this is the miracle of life .
YOUR 4TH ANIVERSARY
HELLO MY DARLING PAUL I HOPE YOU LIKE YOUR BED ROOM TODAY THE CREAM LILLIES AND CREAM ROSES LOOK AND SMELL DEVINE I TEA LIGHTS FLICKERING ON YOUR BED WHERE YOU TOOK YOUR LAST BREATH THE ROOM SMELLS SO SWEET WITH YOUR FAVORITE AFTERSHAVE I HAVE SPRAYED AROUND .DAD JOHN AND ME ARE GOING TO SIT IN YOUR BEDROOM THIS EVENING HOPING WE CAN SENCE YOU THERE . WE ALL WISH WE COULD HAVE YOU BACK WE MISS YOU SO MUCH AND WILL NEVER EVER STOP LOVEING YOU ONE DAY WE WILL ALL BE TOGETHER AGAIN BYE FOR NOW MY SWEET SWEET ANGEL YOUR EVERLOVEING MUM XXXXXXX
I am whispering to Heaven your name, just to see if God would let you home again...
I know its alot to ask but but things have'nt been the same since you went away...
If i could have just one wish, it would'nt be to win the lottery, it would'nt be to never get old... it would be So i could hold your hand and stand with you... Chat with you... Laugh with you...
But i can only wish, So my little Bro all i can do is....
Tell you i Love you, and let you know i miss you...
God Bless & Rest in Peace...
Your Sister Jane
xXx
R.I.P 22nd March 2006
i often think about you Paul, and remember telling you to behave yourself and stay outta trouble and you would always give me one of your cheeky grins! i also remember when i had just had ny son jordan in the maternity at hemel hospital you were upstairs on 1 of the wards and you came down to see me that was just so sweet of you, you had a heart of gold.
i miss you paul
les xxxx
No Goodbye...
No farewells were spoken i did'nt say "goodbye"
You was gone before i knew it, you did'nt choose to die,
You me left me precious memories that make me laugh & cry,
but the love left inside my heart NO millionaire could buy!!!
If tears could build a stairway, and memories a lane, Paul i would RUN right up to heaven, and bring you home again...
I Miss You xXx
cousins thinking of you from australia
dearest cousins jane and john, auntie pat and uncle alan, you are still in our thoughts even though time and distance keeps us all apart. we were all shocked when we heard of pauls passing but keep him in our hearts. love always - steve, liz (steve's wife), lucy and pam in Australia.
my darling son
thankyiu paul for being in my dreams so often may be iwill see you tonight i will love you always mum xxx
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